DML's Boxing Day Swim fur Cinque Ports Rescue

Monday, 23 May 2011


Mee suffered a mahoosive trauma tonite, DML wents up da wooden hill n lefts mee down wivs Da Poppi & Sista Ronnii n wee was all havin a nice snugglee time. Wen all ovs a sudden Da Poppis ring ring fing went off next fing mee knows Da Poppi is takin mi red t shirt off n carryin mee ups da wooden hill.

Mee gots took into da Hu-peeps potty room where DML was sittin in da big water fing wivs her sleepin suit on……………. dats odd mee was finkin next fing mee knows me is in her lap gettin dunked in da wet stuff !!!!! Her washed mee wivs stuff dat smelt of cokey-nuts n hads likkle bits in, den her dids da ultimate horror ! Her dids wets mi uber fluffy  crest n it wents all flat n un fluffy ! ! ! ! ! Horror ovs horrors her den washed mi lipstick n mi butt !!!!!!! Wots wivs dat ?

Her handed mee back to Da Poppi who wrapped mee in a wrappy fing while her gots out ovs da water fing n wrapped herself up. Den she wrapped mee in a blankie as well n started to rubs mee. Most odd fings to do butts it was nice n cosy . Wee wents down da wooden hill den whilst Da Poppi mades Sista Ronnii suffer da same evil fate.

While Sista Ronnii was bein tortured in da water fing DML tried to rubs mee wivs some lotion dat smelt ovs cokey-nut ( does all hu-peeps like dis smell cos mee no likes it at all ) butts mee kept runnin away from her …….BOL. Serves her rite mee finks fur bein so cruel to mee.

Wee dids havs lots ovs snuggles afta butts mee not forgiven her yet. Mi revenge will come later wen her is makin da sleepy noise dat sounds like a busmobile goin ova bumpy roads cos mee will toot rite under her sniffer  bwah ha ha ha !

Has yoo all heard da scandalous news ? Mi uber good buddy Pip has been robbed ! Yes yoo heard dat rite him has been robbed ! His Wondyful Red Wagon was snaffled from off ovs his own porch…………… wot is wrong wivs some ovs dis evil hu-peeps mee jus does not understands dem sometimes. How can some ovs dem bee so very, very nice, kind, carin, lovin & sweet and yet ovvas are mean, nasty, evil, horrid and cruel. Mee finks hu-peeps needs to finks more likes us dogs n kit-kats wee neva do bad fings just cos wee cans.

Anyway on dat fort mee is off to brew up a nasty evil toot fur mi revenge on DML





Sally Ann and Andy said...

I don't like a bath either. I get baths at play school, but I still like play school. You should try it when your older.
Sally Ann

Frankie Furter said...

Uji... this was the mostest SCAREY Horror Story I have heard in like 87 days!!! Cokey Nutty Water Torture is just horrid!! I can NOT believe that YOU and your Sista were subjected to "IT". {{{{{SHIVER}}}}}.

I did hear about poor Pip and his Wagon Theft. This has been a BAD Day fur Blogville.

Mr. Pip said...

Ruh roh, not a bath! I should have warned you about those bath things. Not fun at all. Rumor is I will soon be having one too. When you hear the water turn on, RUN like the wind!!!

Your pal, Pip

Zona said...

I sympathize with you, Pocket-Samuari. (BOL! I love that!!!) Those smelly things the two-leggers use and make us wear are just awful! Bring on the revenge toots if you ask me!!!


PeeS: Yes, it is just AWFUL about Pip's red wagon! The nerve!!

Lorenza said...

Your first bath!
Sounds like it was an interesting experience to you, right?
Hmmmm... I love baths!
Kisses and hugs

Sarge said...

Hey Ujio!
Wow, baths are the worst. The only good thing is that you get to start working up a good stink all over again! BOL BWAR HAR
Grr and Woof,
Sarge, COP

Neeko said...

OMDogness Ujio! You really got Meee scared with your description of your bath…
I thought something was wrong with your sweet Mommy.
Meee thinks that it’s a pawsome way to get lots of attention and smooches from your Pawrents. You must of looked sooo cuuuuuuute with your wetness :o)

Neeko :o)

Leonardo said...

Morning Uji.
All I can say is "wowzer bowzer"!

Moms also was concerned that something had happened to your Mum. Thank Dogness that wasn't the case. Those hoomans can be so tricky!

My Aunt Mary is one of those groomer ladies so Grady and I know when Mom says "let's go see Aunt Mary" that we're going to come home smelling all sweet and purty. Mom does all the work, but having Aunt Mary's foof and poof shop makes it much easier for her.

Since we're Newfies we LOVE the water. Problem is, Aunt Mary's tub isn't quite the same size as our pond so a lot of the water gets slopped out!

Have a great day.
Leo, Grady and The Moms.

Amy and the House of Cats said...

Hi Uji! We have heard of those things - Kirzon and Lola have even had to have them - and we are cats! We didn't have the lotion part but we had the rubbing with the smelly stuff - ours was fruity though (coconutty stuff gives our mom a headache - so no not all the hu-peeps like it). The rest of us have been safe - but we have heard awful things like this happen often - especially to you poor doggies! (We even know a couple doggies and even kitties who LIKE that stuff - sounds crazy doesn't it?) Anyway, we are sorry you had to go through all that, and that poor Ronnii had to go through it too! We hope that neither of you has been too traumatized by it!